Conversations with Ruhi

January 11, 2008 at 7:22 am 1 comment

I think everyone (or at least most people) have had a friend who, for whatever reason, they pretend to hate with all their being. You actually like the person and enjoy their company, but in public you constantly insult and belittle each other. It’s a bizarre short of friendship, the kind of which I currently share with my friend Ruhi.

To wit, I will share with you an archetypal Jacob/Ruhi conversation. This is how we actually behave in public; in fact, this exact conversation occurred just the other day.

Ruhi: That’s lame.
Me: You’re lame.
Ruhi: Your face is lame.
Me: Your mom was lame last night.
Ruhi: I’m okay with that.

Since we’ve gotten back from winter break, Ruhi has declared she hates me no less than twice, and has also claimed we’re not friends anymore an equal number of times. I’m pretty sure she’s just bitter about the fact I tried to hoist her over my head and use her as a rudimentary umbrella.

It is easily one of the strangest friendships I’ve been involved in. When we’re not pretending to fight, we have conversations like this:

Me: Is your room full of otters?
Ruhi: The otter represents Socialism!

For the record, there is no context there. That was the entire conversation. I’m still not sure what it was about.

I associate with the strangest people.

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Flew in from Miami Beach BOAC…. Spasmo! Spasmo! Spasmo!

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