Archive for January, 2008

Nostalgia for the Present

Life goes by ridiculously fast. It’s nearly February now; I’m well into my second term of my second year of University. Pretty soon the year will be over and I’ll be heading wherever for the summer.

Right now, the whole thing has me panicked. On a practical level, I’m going to have to worry about getting into the major I want, which is ridiculously competitive (over one hundred candidates vying for 20 spots). I’m going to need to put together a portfolio and do a bunch of work and it’s just not getting done.

On a more personal level, I’m worried about my friends. We’re all going to be living on different parts of campus next year, and it’s going to be a lot harder to see some of them. I may end up falling out of touch with some very cool people, and it’s kinda bugging me.

Basically it’s reached a point where I’m nostalgic for events that are happening right now.

I’m pretty broken sometimes.

January 28, 2008 at 4:55 pm Leave a comment

Crisis Day 5: In Which The Flash Saves us All

Okay, so it occurs to me that this project has been misinterpreted by a lot of people (mainly from people coming up to me and asking me things about it that make no sense). So I should probably explain what’s going on here.

Essentially, I’m trying to get my life under control. This consists of two stages:

Stage One) Get my shit together. Get my room cleaned, my files organized, get caught up in my course work, find time to write and draw and whatever, get all my ducks lined up in a row.

Stage Two) Having your shit together, put in place a system to keep it together.

This second part is the tricky one; after making progress, how do you keep from backsliding? To that end I’ve created a schedule that will allow me to do all the neat side-projects I want. I never had time for them before, so I looked at what I was doing and made time where I would otherwise have wasted it. Now if I want to write or draw or learn to play piano, I have time set aside in my schedule to allow me to do so. I even have time set aside to do smaller but equally cool things (like watch classic movies I’ve always wanted to see).

And of course, I’ve got Marathon Training scheduled now, so I’m able to go out and run.

That’s basically it. So far things are going well. Huzzah!

January 22, 2008 at 7:11 am Leave a comment

Crisis Day 4: Sleep!

I’ve written three very short (1-2 page) scripts in the last two days. It’s not much, but it trumps my previous output of “nothing”. Go me! I’m on track!

I’m also very, very tired.

Day one of marathon training went well in that I didn’t collapse on the way back. I’ve worked out a schedule that allows me to run three times a week, so things look like they’re going to be pretty okay there. Hurray!

I think I spent two hours today just hole-punching papers to put in binders. On the plus side, I’m organized now.

That’s, uh, pretty much it. I’m having trouble thinking coherently. Very sleepy.

A more detailed look at my self-improvement project tomorrow (hopefully)!

January 21, 2008 at 7:16 am Leave a comment

Crisis Day 3: Not an Actual Crisis

Today was spent doing some house-cleaning that had been delayed far too long. I’m referring to literal house-cleaning; I vacuumed my floor, washed my sheets, dusted the desks and cupboards, the whole nine yards. I still have dishes I need to was, but that will get done tomorrow.

Also happening tomorrow? I start Marathon Training back up. This will be made difficult by the fact I have no idea how far distances are on campus. I’m just going to have to wing it for a few days and see how it goes.

That’s, uh, pretty much it. My “take control of my life” project is going fairly slowly, though surely. I managed to get some writing in today, my homework situation is under control… things seem to be pretty okay so far. I’ll see if I can keep on making improvements.

January 20, 2008 at 7:37 am Leave a comment

Crisis Day 2: Solitude Makes Me Introspective

So, it’s Day One of my project and already I am concerned by the Capitalist overtones of my reinvention.

For example, I want to write more. This means I need to buy something to write in. I want to start drawing, so I need to buy pens and pencils to draw with. This problem becomes even greater in regards to some of my long-term projects, such as learning Bass Guitar. It seems that everything I want to do requires accumulating more possessions.

This is problematic, as I feel I already have too much stuff anyway. Also, it suggests that identity is inherently driven by consumable goods, as it is impossible to ‘become’ something (an artist, a filmmaker, etc.) without first spending money to do so.

I hope to deal with these questions further, but for now I’m adopting a policy of “only doing things which are free”. I’m only going to movies for free (there’s a surprising number of options there), only doing exercise which is free (since my main source is running, that won’t be a problem), and to the best of my abilities constructing things I need myself. Obviously this won’t be possible on a large-scale sense (I don’t have the expertise to build myself a Bass Guitar), I think it will be feasible to build my own writing notebooks and sketchpads out of materials I already have.

Also, my backpack is terribly broken. I was going to buy a new one but now I’m going to see if I can fix it with the tools at my disposal.

In other news, I saw the Samurai-Film classic “Kill!” today. It delivered on the promise of it’s title a hundred fold. Good stuff.

Editor’s Note: I’m just… man, there’s a reason I don’t do personal posts often. They are stupid. I’m so sorry, everyone. Just skip this whole section, okay?

January 19, 2008 at 8:37 am Leave a comment

Crisis on a Very Limited Segment of Earth

I hope everyone will excuse me while I sound very arrogant for a few minutes. I’m not trying to brag.

Lately, I’ve realized I have a major problem in my life; namely, that it’s too easy. I’m well provided for, I don’t have any serious problems, and I’m able to get excellent marks without doing any real work. Now, I’m thankful for the first two; those are key pillars to any stable life. But the fact that I just keep skating through school (and, by extension, most of my life) with no real work involved is troubling.

Now, last term at school I got straight A’s, and an 87% average. This was achieved despite the fact:

-I rarely did assigned readings
-I waited until the last minute to complete any and all work
-I spent only a couple of hours studying for each exam

On one hand, it’s nice not to have to struggle to get through life. On the other hand… well, what’s the point? I’ve never been a fan of taking the easy route, but in this case I find the path to success itself easy.

What makes this particularly bad is that it makes it hard for me to apply myself. I don’t write nearly as much as I want to or as well as I want to; why bother with the extra effort when I end up doing well anyways?

Essentially, I feel like I’m not living up to my potential because there’s currently no challenges in my life to live up to.

So I guess I’ll just have to change that.

<b>Editor’s Note: Later, my life would go to shit due to a variety of circumstances. Curse my youthful arrogance!</b>

January 18, 2008 at 6:38 am Leave a comment

Spasmo! Spasmo! Spasmo!

Last night a few of us got together to watch Burial Ground: A Night of Terror, a low-budget Italian horror film from 1981. It was one of the creepiest things I have ever seen, not because it was scary (it was not), but because there’s a subplot where a kid tries repeatedly to hook up with his own mother.

What the hell, Italy? What the hell?!

The movie also featured the smartest zombies I have ever seen, ones who (among other things) use battering rams, scythes and throwing knives. In one of the weirder scenes, the entire zombie horde disguises themselves as monks in order to catch prey.

None of this is the point, though. The point is that now, because of this, I’m suddenly the kind of guy who watches obscure, low-budget, foreign horror movies. I’m not sure if I can live with that.

The best thing on the DVD was a trailer for an Italian thriller called “Spasmo”. You really have to watch it yourselves.

January 14, 2008 at 5:10 pm Leave a comment

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