Wherein I Prove Just How Big of a Geek I Am

February 12, 2007 at 9:05 pm Leave a comment

Attempts to blog yesterday were interrupted by my friend Mitch, who recently returned from Amsterdam with his friend from Canada (a Canadian…. how novel).

However, I’ve managed to find a few spare moments today (many spare moments, actually; I’m posting from Film Class), and while I won’t have time to do a more substantial post, I can give you a little dose of awesome.

To explain; some time ago, a member of a message board I frequent challenged people to write haikus about superheroes. And oh, how I did write. I don’t want to oversell the results, but I think they may be the greatest poetic achievement of the last 400 years. At the very least, they are scores greater than the works of my greatest foe, William Wordsworth.

Without further ado, the awesome:

Spider-Man 2

Spidey, body strained,
Stops a speeding L-Train. Is
He Jesus or what?

Lament of A Rogue

Villainy Triumphs!
Wait, how did I get in jail?
Aw man, fuck The Flash.

The first, as you can see, commemorates the blatant Christ imagery contained in Spider-Man’s greatest feat of “Spider-Man 2”. The latter is a testament to the fact that The Flash is a complete and utter badass, and anyone planning to tangle with him is looking to get their ass kicked.

In addition, I now present you with one never-before-seen haiku that was not submitted to the aforementioned thread. It explains why Ted Kord, the second Blue Beetle, was one of the greatest heroes to ever live.

Epitaph for a True Hero

Ted Kord; Blue Beetle:
Missed getting superpowers,
fought crime anyway.

Go ahead, Wordsworth. Look upon my work and despair. Once again I am proved your greater, for now and forever.

And that’s my bit of ridiculous geekery for today.

Editor’s Note: Heh. The first two haikus still strike me as kind of cute. With the third one, I forgot to add any sort of humour value; as such, it fails to stand up as well as the other two. Also, this appears to still be in the phase where I was using my blog for self-aggrandizement. I wonder how long that lasted?

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Wait…. What the Hell? It’s my birthday….

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